Oh there's no place like home.....

Ahhh the holiday season. How it can bring out the best or worst in u and the ones u love. How many family arguments started at Christmas and lasted all the way until NEXT CHRISTMAS!!!(church can I get an amen). Wellllll...my vaca was fun, short lived but fun! Certain things that needed to be accomplished got done. Others...still stand undecided.
I can officially say that HE is something I'm okay with letting go of. While always keeping the hope. As I move into the next direction, I have a feeling he'll move with me. I'm confident of that fact.
Now this other person, not so sure. Im very very upset with my best of friend right now. For many and varied a reason but since she wont pick up her PHONE so I can clear this air right now I'll write it out.
You ever been out with ur girls and ya'll are kickin, having a too good time and then one of their "friends" show up. You kno the "friend" that can suck the fun out of Disney World. The "friend" that can't see ur friend happy with nobody else but them? Yeeeeahhh, I've had such a friend and we stayed friends for three years till I decided it wasnt worth my time to continue in the "friendship". Now my bestie has the same plague. And this person is one of the reason she and I did not speak to each for almost a whole MONTH (like seven years in best friend time). And here they are again deflating a wonderfully floating balloon. I have alot invested in our friendship that I am planning (emphasis on "planning") on making a partnership as well. But the balloon deflating distraction creating person is gonna sink this boat before it ever goes out to sea! AHHHHHH why does this keep happening????
I just want one reliable friend is that so hard. I even had a fleeting moment of frustration about far away friend but I been gave that up to God. This is killing me. Like are we SERIOUS! All I want to do is move forward with my life without knowing I'm doing it all alone. I might just take my mom's advice and get a damn dog! (I would if it would raise my rent $250!) Friends are the life's blood of relationships, with no friendship, love cant grow and partnerships end. But good golly jeez!(that was so corny-wow!) I-am-so-fed-up!
Word to wise: Know where ur butter is toasted! Get over urself and ur feelings and recognize who ur REAL friends are. The people who'd take a bullet for u. The folks who'd stand on the block with and for u. Stop giving fly by night people first rank sitting in the spot where ur true blues should be sitting. Or u'll look back at the chair and find urself alone. I really am angry right now and the spirit of doubtfulness is kickin my ass. Help! LORD RIGHT NOW IN THIS MOMENT!
Ima chill and call AGAIN (like I doubt she doesnt have her phone, SHE ALWAYS HAS HER PHONE!) and try to salvage my sanity. Over and out
JOBG